♥ All.For.Eternity.Endless.Fortune.Ambiguity

date of incident happened
Friday, September 18, 2009 |2:32:00 AM

16/09/09

ZeeAvi's Concert @ st.James Powerhouse

few days ago. she gave me a text whether i'm free on Wednesday.

Obviously i said yes.

i mean come on man. it's been like what? 2months since we contacted each other.

So here's the plan. meet up with her under my block.

i got mistaken of meeting her at the mrt station .

so we chilled under the block.

catch up lots of stuffs.

bro came, and sang a phrase from ZeeAvi's song, Bitterheart.

and she went *uhheehee :) *

all shy and stuff.

her aunt fetched us.

had dinner at a Thai restaurant somewhere in Clarke quay.

photos, chats, laughs and ahhem. Certain silence.

Left the place, went to the gents.

chatted abit to kill time.

waited for her and her aunt.

felt the presence of awkwardness.

sat in the car. waited.

dead silence.

wonders in my head.

sped to st.James.

i will never forget the experience in the car, i swear.

it was the most thrilling ride i ever had.

i know she was scared and we were almost flying from one end to the other of the backseat.

*hold tight!*

haaa~ i miss those...

anyway, reached powerhouse.

waited for her aunt's cliques.

i introduce myself to one of her aunt's friend.

so waiting around round round.

1st time in the powerhouse was a hell-of-an experience.

theres lights and full house songs. i don't really know why they call them that way.

i thought the place was big. but it could fit probably a quarter of a soccer field.

chilled.

ordered drinks.

chill ah. it's not alco-drinks.

like are you crazy?

so we had some cola.

chatter with her.

all the "jakun" part comes in.

minutes later, ZeeAvi came.

played her songs.

i gotta tell ya, to those who didn't catch the performance, is such a waste.

good job Zee!

she is super talented i tell ya!

oh well..

after the performance there are autographs sessions, meet-up sessions.

you went away w/o me knowing.

aww~ come on.

poor thing that she felt kinda dizzy.

so she decided to take a sit at our corner.

the Universal manager called us to meet ZeeAvi.

haha i was like "WOAH!" on the inside.

but i said, "hey zee! my name's Zaki....."

she was so happy to meet Zee.

Zee was shocked to see her cousin dressed nicely for the night.

since there were people waiting for us to go, we decided to leave and hopefully to meet her later after everything ends.

*to be continued*

date of incident happened
Friday, September 4, 2009 |2:19:00 AM

Hello guys.

it's me.

yeah i'm back, eventually.

don't think that something happy happened to me that made me resurrected the blog.

it's just random thought.

though......

put all worries/confusions aside, let's put it this way, i never felt this way.

the feeling of being able to do your own stuffs w/o any disturbance.

but i won't put it as you are a disturbance.

you are not.

you were never a disturbance.

yet you put me in a different position, a better one.

*hmph* i can't believe time have passed so fast.

you know yourself that i am talking about you.

if you're reading this... hmm just to tell ya that i hope you're happy with what you're going through now.

i know you've been waiting to be on your own huh?

you've been giving me pranks and stuffs.

why huh?

is that really the way to find out my true feelings for you.

i mean.. Can't you see? for the past times i've been giving it all for you.

insisting on slacking at your place was the in-thing.

helping with your work.

watching you stress all about your work was really cute of you.

in fact, you were enjoying it huh?

sorry, i guess that was a bad joke.

having dinner with your family.

play with your siblings, cousins was an experience never to forget.

not to mention you too.

oh well fate/takdir is inevitable.

nan don punirago~

oh oh only for you.

date of incident happened
Saturday, June 27, 2009 |12:00:00 AM

26th June, 2009

proud to say i got straight A's for this semester's results and a Very Good conduct for my lifeskills.

am very grateful and glad that i have worked hard for this moment.

date of incident happened
Saturday, June 20, 2009 |12:51:00 AM

June 19th 2009

(staring into your eyes)

it's a nightmare+joke today.

met her at bugis.

had 2nd lunch at tong seng coffehouse..i think that's the name.

had laksa.

she had nothing, just ice lemon tee.

got some stuffs out of each others' thoughts.

talked about LAW and Apologies.

left the place.

walked aimlessly.

talked about stuffs.

important stuffs.

i knew something was going to happen.

sat at some place where there aren't much people.

straight forward comes in the story.

broke down.

can't believe it.

hard to believe.

but it just happened anyway.

and end of the story, i got punked.

yepp.. that's what happened to me.

now traumatised and shocked.

insomnia gushed through my veins.

endless thoughts came into my mind.

i knew it was a relief. but i still can't get over it

--<3>

date of incident happened
Thursday, June 11, 2009 |7:48:00 PM

entry for June 11th, 2009

today was a extremely homey day. woke up late.

got nothing to do. play psp, just too boring.

play ps3? well, don't feel like it.

not much people to text.

it feels like crap basically.

how i wish things would be like how it used to be

i give everything just to see you smile:)

date of incident happened
Saturday, May 30, 2009 |1:58:00 AM

entry for 29-05-09

what a big night! phew! it felt like an exercise!

i got tricked by you. but it ended up pretty good <3 she text me whether i'm free, but sadly, i was napping. "what the hell!" yeah i know. don't mention. woke up at around 6+. replied her but it was too late. *awww. missed it*

anyway, at about dinner time she told me that something happened to her. so i went down to see her. and i thought she was hurt or sumtin. sekali no lah! and the thing is, i brought some medication and tissue because the way she told me sounded like it's serious!

we sat on a nearby bench. she gave me birthday presents. there was a couple of tees and cakes. i was thrilled and i gotta tell ya, my heart was racing! it felt like the sound of a horse galloping. sheesh! and i got tired from smiling cheek to cheek.

i was ecstatic. this feels like a fantasy, so good that you're just feel like you're in a different world.. a world made up of happiness and excitement.

i wanted to send her home because the time she spent for me is totally priceless. and all the things she did for me. i can't take it lightly. i mean come on. you gotta appreciate what your loved ones do for you right. this is like common sense right?

i love her. and she's all that i have. i won't let anything disrupt our relationship. nothing.

we head home. her cousins were there. had fun with 'em. watched monster inc. in disney channel.

after movie finished, sent her cousins home. instead of sending them, we went in. haha! the kid was super duper uber hyper maan. jeez! no wonder why she's slim :)

after the whole night "exercising", i went home.

that's all i can put ok. no more.

haha sorry readers.

anything after that is between me and her.

words of the day:

you know, sometimes in life you can't be all good like an angel. you have to be equal and balanced.

you can't be all too good or vice versa.

people won't like you that way.

date of incident happened
Friday, May 29, 2009 |7:52:00 PM

alright guys. in a few hours my 18th year will be forever gone!

my 19th will be a new adventure for me :)

we'll see what's in store up for my 19th birthday.

date of incident happened
Monday, May 11, 2009 |7:11:00 PM

It's Monday, May 11th, 2009
7:10pm

i got home like a normal nerdy boy would do.

when the bell tells us that it's time to go, then it's time to go.

i'm just a normal average guy who has different capabilities.

i enjoyed singing as much as people do.

i still can't find my true voice yet, you know.

it felt like you're trying to be someone you're not.

although i adore rain's vocal strength but when it comes to singing his songs, i tend to sound LIKE him.

and to be a professional singer/artist, you gotta find you comfortable spot which you can relax and just let the tone of your voice flow along your vocal chords/box.

and i tend to "force" my voice?? which i don't get it.

There was once that she told me that i tend to sing from my nose, not from my diaphragm.

i know how it feels like singing from my diaphragm, but when it comes to high, difficult notes, i tend to force it out from my throat (which i am not supposed to..) , rather than using my diaphragm to control it.

TIP: you gotta relax your muscles on your throat and also use the correct breathing techniques in order to get a good result.

*It takes a whole lot of practice!

i enjoyed playing the guitar although i am still getting used to switching in different chords and stuffs.

(ugh..my neck aches)

gotta get used to it.

SO! back to reality, i've been mugging these days.

i don't intend on continuing my studies to higher nitec because:-

1. It grabs a whole lot of your lifetime

2. You gotta stick with the same old rules: uniform.

3. You gotta make new friends.

4. You gotta start all over again. But deeper in a sense that your challenges are way tougher.

5. You have to go around the bush for 2 YEARS in order to get to polytechnic.

+ i can't afford to lose this opportunity.
+ i need to get to poly after ite.

Adios!

*Still Loving you as always*